I blame the chair.

Let's see. I've posted one story about my occasional brain malfunctions so I'm going to dive right into a story about my lack of balance. Let me point out that this is merely the beginning. These stories go way back, and since according to my friend Will, "[I] fall more than any individual in the history of the world" there are definitely more stories to come.

I believe this occurred over the summer? Or end of the school year? Oh yes, I remember. My friend Renee was getting married in June, and I was searching for a gold pair of sandals to wear with my dress to her wedding. That search led me to the Providence Place Mall, where I bought a pair but wasn't super happy with them, but was desperate. Anyway.

I remember getting Johnny Rockett's for dinner because their burgers and fries are really good. I then went to visit Sasha and Lauren. I think they had just bought a Wii or new games for the Wii or something. So they were playing, I was sitting in a chair with a TV tray eating my dinner. For whatever reason when I eat on a tray I feel the need for my legs to be like fully under it, and the tray really close to me (I attempted this same maneuver with my ottoman/coffee table with equally if not worse results, another story for another day though.)

As I was inching forward, closer to the tray, the lovely chair I was sitting on flipped forward, I crashed to the ground, blanket that was on said chair now covering me like a ghost, and I slid half-way under the TV tray- thankfully not spilling my burger and fries.

Luckily Lauren was quick enough with her iPhone to capture this moment:

(image from Lauren's iPhone)

Then the problem of being able to get up arose as I had miraculously gone to the gym (a rare occurrence in those days, I've been doing really well lately though!) and I was too sore to lift my legs up over the bar on the TV tray. Lauren came to help and try and move the tray but because I was laughing too hard and my abs hurt too much I couldn't get out!!! Good lord, how ridiculous.

Needless to say I finally got out from under that mess and finished my dinner. I hadn't even started drinking yet either!! My lack of balance knows no bounds- sober, trashed, it doesn't matter!

As a sort of side note about my lack of balance, I work at a jewelry store a few weekends a month and I put one of these aside for myself in the hopes that it'll give me supernatural help with my balance issues:

(image from polyvore)

Updates to follow on that front.